This is a sales pitch. It's not going to be won by the law, it's going to be won by the lawyers.
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
Whatever happened to saluting an officer when he leaves the room?
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
Oh, now I see what you're saying! It had to be Professor Plum, in the library, with the candlestick!
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
We have softball games and marching bands. They work at a place where you have to wear camouflage or you might get shot!
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
That's a relief! I was afraid I wasn't going to be able to use the 'liar, liar, pants-on-fire' defense.
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
Maybe if we work at it we can get Dawson charged with the Kennedy assassination.
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
Why does a Lieutenant junior grade with a track record for plea bargains get handed a murder case? Could it be so it never sees the inside of a courtroom?
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
The only thing I have to eat is Yoohoo and Cocoa Puffs, so if you want anything else bring it with you.
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
I'm sorry, I keep forgetting. You were sick the day they taught law at law school!
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
And the hits just keep on comin'.
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
You don't need to wear a patch on your arm to have honor.
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
So this is what a courtroom looks like.
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
Now, is that 0600 in the morning, sir?
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
She has no point. She often has no point. It's part of her charm.
Lt. Daniel Kaffee
I'm pacing myself.
Lt. Daniel Kaffee